Archive | October, 2010

The Darkside Doesn’t Have Cookies Anymore

17 Oct

I was thinking about posting one of my old poems, but while I was reading through them to decide which one feels more relevant now, I realized that none of them do.
   I wrote most of them only two years ago, but I can’t connect with them anymore. I know that a lot has changed since in the past two years, but how could I change so much?
   Whatever was lost back then, it must have come back. Because I don’t feel that way anymore.
   Here is one of those old-me poems, it’s called “The Darkside Has Cookies”:

I am not crazy.
I saw him, I touched him.
He took my hand and kissed it.
He was here, it was real.

Then you rushed in and turned the on light.
It became bright.

As he started to fade,
towards you I pointed all my hate.

Just then it came to my head.
You had saved me from my dream,
the darkest and most dangerous of them all,
disguised as something sweet and to that I can never say no.
My worst nightmare.
I still did not want to let go.

I’d screamed in my sleep, you said, and that’s why you had come in.
The brightness slowly made me gain my full conscious.
All my hate drained, and I felt I owed you a “thanks”.

But,
A part of me, the one that he had touched,
still wanted him, too much.
It was to him forever lost.

Misery Loathes Company

10 Oct

Why do some people think that they do not deserve to be successful or loved; that they are meant to be alone and miserable?
   And how do they get past that irrational idea?

Going With The Wind

9 Oct

When the wind is as strong as today, I sometimes wish I could let it take me where it wants to go. Preferably to some where sunny; it doesn’t even have to be Cuba.

Present Day Stress

8 Oct

I can’t imagine a world without trains or busses.

Escapism Is A Selfish Thing

7 Oct

Where does time go? I sat down a while ago with a book, and suddenly it was already evening. I wouldn’t say that I have wasted the whole day, but I didn’t do anything of significance. Though I sure do enjoy reading a good book!

Runway Pressure

7 Oct

Some days, those days when I am even less perfect than usually, life feels like a runway and everybody is examining me under a microscope where I walk by. I crumble then, by the pressure to look flawless. But I never stay down too long. As the famous, famous american professor Hannah Montanastein once said: “Nobody’s Perfect. Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days. Everybody knows what-what-what I’m talkin’ ’bout, everybody gets that way, yeah!”

Time

6 Oct

Sometimes life seems to pass me by, as if someone had pressed the fast forward button on the remote control. Minutes, hours, days, weeks, seasons … life is passing in ultra speed, while I am standing in the middle of it, trying to keep up in slow motion. I’m skipping some lovely and some horrific scenes, unwillingly; I want to experience it all.
   Suddenly the phrase “Carpe diem” has a meaning of real importance to it.